Organic panic

I just can't resist a free sample. I had been walking on the other side of the street and had even gone slightly past the shop in question when I was drawn into the entrance lobby by the sheen of something gaudy and orange in little plastic cups and the allure of things on a tray held by an enthusiastically smiling Japanese man. I asked what the orange stuff was and he said 'carrot juice' in an over-eager way. Not something I would typically choose but it wasn't too bad. The tray turned out to be holding very dry, worthy rice crackers - the type eaten by people who need to exercise their jaw like an overexcited toddler and are trying to break their dependence on Nutrigrain. Once I'd eaten them, I thought it would be rude to just walk off, so I wandered into the shop. Everything was incredibly virtuous and organic. My panic mounted as I passed the aisle of Soya Dream: what was I going to buy? Hemp oil wasn't tempting me... Eventually I settled on a fairly neutral bag of dried chickpeas, which didn't break the bank and can be made into something delicious with the addition of some fat and salt, among other ingredients. The woman at the check-out could sense I was not a regular customer, and I thought I had escaped but... just as I was holding out my hand for the receipt, she struck: 'Do you have a points card?' I don't think I am ever going to be quite eco enough to qualify as a member of this particular shop, but maybe that can be my New Tax Year resolution.